While in the bathroom with my two older boys, I asked them to wash their hands. Caleb had just killed a fly (with his bare hands) and Taite, well, he always needs a good hand washing :) – while in there, Caleb proceeded to tell me with a very disrespectful and ungrateful tone…
“I wish we had a different bathroom.”
I asked him “Why?”
He said “Because ours isn’t clean enough.”
Mind you, the bathroom was not bad, it had been a week since I had cleaned it, but that is because we were out of town… and well, life happens. The flesh in me wanted so badly to lash out at Caleb. His tone was so ugly towards me when he said it… that all I could think of was “You ungrateful child” and I wanted to put him in his place right there, with a sharp sentence and harsh look.
The Lord must of been working in me that very moment though… and instead of lashing out, I said “you know what Caleb… follow me” – I then proceeded to take him to our bedroom, where the computer is – and googled “Dirty Bathroom” – I asked him to shut his eyes, in fear of what images may come up with the word “dirty” in the search phrase… While him and his brother sat there with their eyes shut, I brought up a few various photos of messy toilets and bathtubs…. and then simply asked Caleb “Do you think our bathroom is dirty now?”
He looked at me and shook his head.
I then went even deeper into our conversation and began to talk to him about those who do not have homes… those who have to use the bathroom in a nearby gas station or behind a dumpster. I then googled “homeless children” and showed him and Taite countless photos of children without a home.
A photo of a child holding a blanket over his head for protection … and told them “that is his roof“… he has no home.
I talked to them about how some children don’t have beds…
No toys…
No food…
No TV…
No clean clothes….
and so on.
I stressed how blessed we are… and how we should be so very thankful the Lord has provided us with a home and a working bathroom.
Our conversation went from dirty bathrooms…
to home less, to then the amount of work it takes for me to keep a house clean.
I listed so many things I can’t even remember… I think often times children don’t realize the amount of work their mother does. I know I didn’t as a kid! I spat off so many task I even began to think “wow, how do I keep up” HAHA… its a lot!
Caleb and Taite listened very well… and were pretty much speechless… Caleb had tears welling up in his eyes, I could tell this was hitting him. I then took it to the last step, and told Caleb I wanted him to see how much work it takes to clean a bathroom… and I directed him on how to clean the bath tub and shower, the toilet and counter top/sink area. The entire time he never once complained… and did it with a very humbled attitude…
Afterwards he said “I need to tell Daddy about this.”
So… despite it taking effort to go through all of this with my kids… and the process of showing Caleb to properly clean the bathroom, was tedious and took twice as long as It would had I done it myself… I think the experience and things talked about were something they both needed to really hear.
It also helped me realize that I need to enforce chores more.
Our kids do minimal chores.
Make Beds.
Put Clothes away.
Put dishes up
Clean up toys in their room, the living room and Owens room.
Take out Trash (smaller bags)
Tidy up the School room
Feed the Cat
but that is really about it…
They could do far more!
I would love to find a good chore chart. Anyone have one?
*updated: I made a cute chore chart for the boys. Thanks Kellie for the inspiration :) – These are pdf file so I can open them in photoshop and change the chores from week to week with a click of a button. The “clip art” can also be changed if the boys want that switched up as well.
Also Valerie linked to a good list of chores for kids around age 6… I may tweak this chart a wee bit as the days pass, to see how it works – but for now I think its cute. We will use simple CHECK MARKS or sticks to put in place of it being done.*
