It seems like its been ages since I actually posted a blog post with some real thought put into it. :)
The move and the birth of our 4th, among other things…. seem to have pushed the ability to blog away. Which is fine. There are seasons where this happens….
Our life right now is so busy and full of adjustments still.
Travis’ job is hard.
Between dealing with high risk situations, drugs, suicides, death and very late nights… not to mention the incredible amt of material he is having to learn and memorize with this new job… his ability to pour into us right now is difficult… which I am understanding about… but its never easy either. Hoping that all levels out soon. He realizes it, so that is always good. Its just learning to find new balance that takes time.
Between that, we are still unpacking boxes… finishing up the cleaning of our former home…
and at the same time organizing my business… which is so busy right now (Thankful but overwhelmed)….
Home schooling is on HOLD for a few weeks… as we figure things out and we have hopes of starting our new year in schooling this year earlier, July probably… so that we can take off some time this fall for a vacation…. maybe.
The transition into our new home has gone smoothly, I think… but we also greatly miss our former neighbors and as of now our new neighbors aren’t exactly “lovely….” – Lets just say, we will not be close and I am thankful their house is listed for sale. Enough said? :) Kay. You want to “love” those type of people and pray for their soul… but at the same time, it sure is hard… and a big part of you just wants them gone. Lets pray for their soul and a quick sale? ;-)
Travis and I will be graduating from the program we are in at our church.
I had debated if I should put it out there, what this program actually is… and after much thought I am totally convinced HIDING it any longer is pointless. I believe in being an open book and what we go through will ultimately in the end hopefully bless others and be a tool in ministry.
As many of you know, who have followed this blog for the last few years… you know that my husband resigned as Senior Pastor at our former church, West End Baptist in NE NC. You can read his resignation HERE.
He was asked to leave the church… for no real “biblical” reason… To elaborate he had deacons telling him they wish he didnt wear jeans… they wish he didn’t preach messages that “offended” people…. and that any problem ultimately was “HIS FAULT” even things that were not even related to what he did. Yea, it was pretty sad.
We found out later the church had a history of firing their pastors every few years… and while we do not know all the background information regarding all the situations before us… we do know that the reasoning for them wanting Travis’ gone, was not right… and I believe firmly they are reaping what they sow because of it. Which breaks our heart at the same time because we truly love and miss many of the people there…..
That being said. What seemed like such a BAD thing at the time… being kicked to the curb and left to find a way out… was in the end a great blessing.
We got into a program called City of Refuge at First Baptist Church Woodstock…. close to Atlanta, GA.
Lets just say… 100′s of Pastors apply every year… and for 2011 we were one of the last families chosen for that year… and I believe at the time they only had 9 families in the program. So to get in is huge…. at least for us it was.
They basically provided us a home… a refuge… a safe place… counsel…. community…. and the ability to be real… genuine and vulnerable for the 1st time EVER…. and as a Pastor and Pastors wife this was huge.
Here is a snippet off the church website that sums up what City of Refuge is:
Pastor Johnny observed, ” Christians are sometimes the worst about shooting their own wounded and then leaving them in the field to bleed to death.” He wanted the Body at First Woodstock to be different. He envisioned a ministry that would enable hurting ministers and their families to find hope and healing and so the City of Refuge Ministry was born.
To often in ministry the Pastor and his family are held to such high esteem, that you cant be real… at least that is how many churches make it… you have to uphold this “image” of perfection and strength… that being genuine to the people can be difficult. As a Pastors wife I felt very alone…. even though every sunday I was surrounded by people… I did not feel at home and I did not feel I was able to be myself…. even though I was in ways…. but in many ways I was not.
I hated the way we had to dress…. and how ritualistic our worship felt…. I felt trapped at times in our church… and what people found important drove me nuts….
Any how… we are all imperfect people with our own “stuff” – but one thing I wish those in the church would realize… especially these older baptist churches… is that their Pastor and his wife…. and their kids… are “normal” and “wounded” people too….
City of Refuge has changed our lives.
We are so thankful for it.
Our time in the program is drawing to an end soon…
I am going to miss it!!
… but at the same time I am so thankful for the journey through it… and thankful we are able to stay here for hopefully a very long time ;-) – but then again, you never know!